New Look.

I decided it was time for a new look. Don’t be alarmed.

I Hate Women.

The most popular post I have ever done is this one. If you haven’t read it and commented please do. I wonder what all you lurkers think about this.

It’s back.

I’m horny again! Actually, I started feeling more like myself last Sunday. It still took a lot of work on my husband’s part, but he brought me to the top again. He really does have a magical tongue. Throughout this whole drugged few weeks he has been an absolute angel to me. He has put up with strange outbursts of emotional garbage from me, and he has exhibited a level of patience I didn’t know was humanly possible. He’s been helping me make plans on how to get back to business on my dissertation. He is giving me deadlines! I always function better with deadlines. Now I just have to get him to give me an incentive to meet the deadlines. I think it would nice for him to promise to get me flowers or take me out for dinner if I meet his deadlines. That reminds me; he bought me an incredibly beautiful plant. It was unexpected and soooo sweet of him. I love how he makes me feel when he does stuff like that. Of course, I have no idea how to take care of is so it will probably meet the same demise as all my other plants (exept for the aloe that is still stubbornly alive).

Anyway, back to sex. I’m out of town for my orchestra job this weekend and I was super horny the first night (Thursday). So, my husband and I had phone sex. It’s something we used to do a lot of before we were married. It wasn’t as fun as I remembered it being. He got me to cum easily enough, but the magic just wasn’t there. Maybe I’m jaded because I get to have actual sex with him every day now. Or maybe I’m still not back to normal after that nasty drug. I’m thinking it’s the drug because I wasn’t horny yesterday at all. And I’m not horny at all today either. I crave his hugs and kisses more than anything else.

Ok, new topic. I went to a salon here yesterday and got my hair done. I dyed it red with blonde highlights. My natural color is very dark brown so it’s a bit of a change. Although not as much as I had hoped. I got it cut, too and I like the way the girl did it. I’m kind of a newbie to getting my hair done in a salon. My grandfather owned a beauty salon so when I was growing up I always got my hair cut there. The problem was, he only did old ladies’ hair so I basically came away with simple trims and kept my hair really long. Yesterday was quite the experience. I found a salon with what I think was the friendliest group of ladies. It actually felt a lot like my grandfather’s shop in a way. Everyone was so nice to me! I ended up getting my eyebrows waxed for the first time ever. Now I don’t look like a Greek hairy monster any more. LOL The girl taught me how to style my hair and explained everything she was doing. It was awesome!!!

Ok, now back to work on this damned dissertation from hell.

The simple things.

I have been noticing the simple pleasures in daily life. More on that later.

Valium renders me completely useless and therefore all I can do these days is sleep and think. That is, until the valium is out of my system. I will never take another one of those nasty little pills again. They have killed my sex drive completely. I also cannot wake up in the morning. It’s almost impossible to wake up.

I wistfully miss sex. I don’t actually want sex, but I remember it being fun so I kind of want to know what it’s like again. I even tried to masturbate the other day. Couldn’t cum. That’s right ladies and gentleman, for the first time in my entire life I couldn’t bring myself to orgasm. And believe me I tried everything. This sucks.

A few more days and the drug should be out of my system for good.

Back to life’s simple pleasures as noticed by me while in the drug induced stupor. The smell of fall in the air. Fresh air makes me feel good. The sound of windchimes. It’s a beautiful rainy night here and I have the window open in my office. I’m loving the sound of someone’s windchimes gently trilling in the cool night air. I usually hate the sound of those things. Mainly because it seems like an intrusion into my peace and quiet. For some reason tonight they are beautiful to me.

Music. I love music. I love listening to music. I love the memories I have attached to music. I can relive those memories each time I hear the piece they were made to. I love learning new music. I love practicing music. I love music. I’m so lucky to be a musician. You all have no idea how awesome it is!!! Ok, I’m biased, but then again it’s all I’ve ever known. I get to have my job be something I would do even if I was independantly wealthy. I never have to “work” another day in my life.

I love the innocence of children. I teach violin lessons for a living and each time I meet a new child I am impressed by how good they innately are. I have a lot of respect for the parents who get it right, too. There are some really bad parents out there, but when they get it right, the children are such a joy to be around. Here is a message to all of you who have children: Don’t use your children as weapons to piss off their violin teacher. The child isn’t the one responsible for paying me. You are. Grow up and pay up when I tell you to.

Ok this thing is long enough. I’m done rambling for now. LEAVE SOME COMMENTS.

my house is clean!!!!!

Since I have to teach one student at home tomorrow I had to make sure at least a path was clean so she could get through to the studio. Well I got very motivated and cleaned everything. It’s so much nicer in here when it’s clean.

Yesterday something pretty cool happened. University of North Dakota beat the University of Northern Iowa in football. UND is a division 2 school better known for it’s div. 1 hockey team. Football is not that important at UND. UNI is a div. 1 AA school and football is pretty important. Well football is pretty much a religion in that state. I am from North Dakota and while I did not attend UND I still think it’s pretty funny that some boys from the frozen wasteland beat some good corn fed Iowa boys. It definitly made me smile.

One thing that isn’t making me smile these days is the lack of comments here. I have seen a HUGE increase in traffic, but these people are not commenting. Come on!! At least say you hate it if you don’t like what you read here. It’s not that hard! And if you aren’t leaving comments because you don’t have a wordpress blog, then sign up as a user. It won’t take long and then you can leave comments!

AND who is reading this blog in Iowa City, IA? Please write me an email cause I’m just curious.

I’m sore.

Yesterday afternoon my husband “attacked” me and “forced” me to let him fuck me. We actually ended up wrestling for about 40 minutes before he wore me down enough to make me submit. I had decided to fight back as hard as I could because it just seemed fun. If I hadn’t been giggling intermittantly it would have completely sounded like I was being assaulted. It was awesome! He fucked me hard while holding me down. I loved feeling overwhelmed and unable to escape. He came inside me and then made me masturbate with my vibrator while he fucked me with a pretty large toy. After a while he was hard again and fucked me from behind while I kept the toy on my clit. I’m still sore today!

GREAT DAY.

I have had the best day in a long long time. I made a lot of progress on my proposal. Well not a ton because it isn’t finished yet. But, I did work for a large portion of the day. Sex is the furthest thing from my mind. I haven’t had sex since sometime last week. Maybe I should go do that now…. lol.

Valium.

Sorry about the prolonged absense. It was unintentional. I swear! I was out of town over the long weekend. I’m trying to get myself motivated to leave the house and work in the library every day. So far it’s been tricky. My doctor prescribed valium for me today. I have been dealing with anxiety and when I’m anxious I get nothing done. So even though I’m feeling better right now, we are trying it to see what it makes me feel like so that when I’m dealing with anxious feelings again it might help. I just hope it doesn’t turn my brain to mush and make me lay around the house all the time….. Has anyone had any experience with Valium?

Quiet.

It’s kind of quiet around here. Where is everybody?