I’m sad and he’s not comforting me. Today my heart was broken and he doesn’t understand. He didn’t cause the heartbreak – my health insurance company did. They won’t cover a new treatment I need for something (it’s not life threatening just embarassing). For a few weeks I felt like I might actually be able to get rid of this condition, but now I’ll have it until I die or get a new insurance company first. Now more than ever I need to get a job.

I feel sad and there is nobody to comfort me. Why is it that he won’t comfort me unless he thinks I have a real reason to be sad? Why do I feel like I have to prove that I should be allowed to be sad. He hasn’t hugged me in over a day.

Last night he told me I don’t do anything. He’s mad that I’m not writing my dissertation. I know I should be writing it, but I decided to take a break for part of the summer and then start over because I hit huge roadblocks both in my mind and in my committee. I have made the decision that I will start working on it again after the 4th of July. I guess this means that he won’t love me until I finish my dissertation. That sucks….