I’m not going to let yesterday bother me. Anyone who goes into an existential crisis after having coffee with me is not worth my time. We did exchange a few more emails and it seems like he just wants to take things slow. I may or may not respond if he ever contacts me again.

In other news. There’s another guy. D lives in my town also, and I’ve been chatting with him about as long as S, but he only recently (last night) asked to meet. He was online all day yesterday while the drama unfolded with S and I was telling him what was happening. His take on the whole thing is that S is not a committed Dom so it was good that I won’t be bothering with him anyway.

My conversations with D have been more practical and I don’t feel like he’s pushing anything. It’s just exploration type of talking. He knows I’m inexperienced and that’s apparently a good quality in a sub. I had no idea. We exchanged pictures and talked about what sort of rules we’d have. He’s not only ok with the idea of my husband being in the room it is actually a turn on for him to be watched. He’s looking forward to it. That fact alone is making me more comfortable. S was always a bit wary of that fact. Perhaps that was part of his reason for stopping.

D is extremely attractive and has lots of experience in being a Dom. He’s also a painter. I do believe that I’ll identify better with an artist than a writer. I’m not as intimidated by him intellectually because artists and musicians have more in common. This allows me a greater level of comfort and perhaps leading to trust. It requires a lot of trust to let someone tie me up or punish me. I’m usually naturally very trusting, but I am being careful now. Especially after what I felt yesterday.

So a meeting has been planned for the 11th in the evening. We’re meeting for coffee and leaving it open ended. My husband will be with me so if things go well and we’d like to play that night it could happen. Now I just have 8 days to wait. A lot can change in that length of time. I’m not holding my breath.