Well, dear readers, the unexpected has happened. This time there is a real reason for my recent absence on the blog. It is something that has irrevocably changed my sex life forever. Something I can’t go back and do over. Something that scares the hell out of me.

I’m pregnant.

I’ve been married to Jack for coming up on 10 years. For the first 6 years we didn’t use protection or birth control pills (this was before current lifestyle began). After not getting pregnant for 6 years (as well as some medical reasons) I assumed, along with my doctors, that I would never conceive without medical intervention.

That brings us to July. I switched from the regular birth control pill to the kind where I’d only have a period 4 times a year. There were a few weeks during the transition where I did not take any pills. We weren’t playing with anyone at the time so I didn’t even think to take other precautions with my husband since there was no way I’d get pregnant in my mind.

I didn’t find out until 10/31 that I was indeed knocked up. The thought hadn’t even crossed my mind until there was no period at the end of the three months of new pills like there should have been. I took a home test on that fateful Halloween evening, and got the scare of my life. Positive. Tested again the following morning and it was positive again.

I went to the doctor Monday afternoon and the blood test confirmed that I wasn’t just pregnant, but very pregnant (meaning much more than a few weeks along). Turned out I was 17 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby.

How did I not know I was pregnant? Well, I never got the nausea most women experience. I was tired all the time starting in July, but I just thought it was because we’d just moved house and I was tired from that. Followed by me having H1N1 in early October; basically I always had a legitimate excuse to be tired. My boobs did really hurt, but that was one of the side effects listed on the new birth control pills I was taking. They REALLY hurt, too. Jack kept commenting on how big they were, but I hadn’t noticed a real change until I looked at a picture of myself naked and compared it to older such pictures. MUCH bigger, and I was already quite large in that department.

So, now I’m 22 weeks along and I’m still trying to figure out how the hell I’m going to be a mother. Even though I’m 32 and married I still feel like the teenager who finds herself knocked up in high school.

Overall, I’m super happy this is happening. Don’t get me wrong, I always wanted a child…..someday. I just thought that we should wait until I have the sort of employment where I can get maternity leave. Self-employed, freelance musicians certainly do not get anything of the sort.

This is, for lack of a better word, a miracle. The look on Jack’s face when he looks at me now is amazing. He’s soooo thrilled to be a father. He’s been ready for a really long time.

Seeing the baby on the ultrasound screen was an experience I can’t even describe. We saw it moving around. They printed out some 3-D pictures of the baby’s face as well as another 2-D picture of the bottom of it’s foot! How cute!

I’m stunned by what my body is doing. I can feel the baby moving around. It usually feels like gentle pokes like if someone were tapping you on your arm to get your attention. But starting today the baby started poking me with some bony appendage. That’s a bit annoying and I know it will only get “worse” the bigger the baby gets.

So, there you have it. I got myself knocked up by Jack (and it’s MOST DEFINITELY Jack’s baby, stop thinking that, people!!! lol). I’m due in April. We have tentatively decided to stop “playing” especially with new people. We might see D again for some basically vanilla fun, but no V or anyone else. We may change our mind, but my sex drive has sort of hidden itself behind all this mommy/hormone crap.

Can you even imagine Jack and Mia being parents!??!?